The kids are coming to get the cats today. It's time for them to go home. They have a plan where Adam's brother Alec will come stay with them if it gets too hard to be in the house alone. The devastating reminders of that day haunt them. I'm glad to know they are trying to move forward. They stopped to see their co-workers today which was very difficult for them. They both work for the same company which is owned by Adam's step-dad so it gets very personal. Work is their extended family and it's a hard visit.
Here at home, we have our own difficulties. Jeff sobs in his sleep. He gets up and the sight of the baby's little horsey toy makes him cry. It's all we have left to hold on to. We realize that this is the first time since this happened that we can wholly feel our own pain. We spent so much time concentrating on helping the kids that we really didn't have the opportunity to feel our own sorrow.
I have a car full of baby things and I cannot face the day. I need to contact work, I need to find a place to put the baby things. All my strength only gets me to the computer to e-mail work. That's all I thinking I can do today. The pain in my heart has become physical. Every bone in my body aches. But Bailee calls and says she will stop by to get some of her things so I mustered up the energy to move the baby's things into storage.
Bailee did stop by and she wanted me to go to Target with her. I told her I was going to Olive Garden for soup and salad and she decided to come along. The lunch was nice but the trip to Target, not so nice. Everything in the store was a reminder of all the things we would buy for baby. We both walked out mentioning that it would be a long time before we could go back again.
The cards keep coming.
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