Welcome Ruxin!

Now that Jeff's second rotator cuff surgery is complete, I find myself all alone. He is back to work and home is rather quiet and lonely. Since I struggle to do things I used to do, I don't really go out of the house much so there's not a lot to look forward to unless I am spending time with my granddaughters. I hate to admit it but I talk to myself a lot. Way too much. Jeff noticed my increased sadness and in an offhanded way, he wondered if I would ever be ready for another pet. I dismissed the comments though they were a nice gentle nudge toward filling my needs.

After a few weeks of increased loneliness at home I finally decided that it's time to get on with things...I want a new pet. Jeff's suggestion finally sunk in. I didn't think I could say that for a very long time. Between losing Toby and Nomad my heart has been so broken. But a new rescue kitty really feels right. So after making that decision, I started to look...and look. I've been drawn to the same kitty photo I found on a local no-kill pet shelter site. I finally got up the nerve to drive over to see said kitty only to find that she was gone. All the kitties were adopted at that location which was a good thing. But disappointing for me. So I got in the car and drove past a pet store that had a sign out in front stating they had new cats and kittens ready for adoption. So I took a chance and drove in.

I was glad to see the sign said cats and kittens. I really did not want a kitten. Everyone wants kittens. I wanted the unwanted. But not too unwanted. An adult cat was fine but I didn't want one over the age of 9 or 10 knowing my heart could be broken way too soon. I am just not strong enough for that as selfish as it may sound. And I wanted a kitty that picked me out, not the other way around. So I was looking for that one who was looking for me.

I walked into the pet store and the sign inside said that all the cats were from the Elmbrook Humane Society so if I get a pet there, I had to do the paperwork and pay for the cat through that shelter. I was glad to see that. I walked up to the glass window with all the kitty cubes and a few turned their heads to look at me then went back to doing what cats do best: sleep. Then there was this one guy who stared me down. The closer I got the more straight he sat up and even closer and he was trying to climb through the glass to get my attention. He definitely had my attention. So I asked if I could visit him. The store clerk put me through a series of questions before he would let me see the kitty. I was glad he was thorough.

I met the cat and felt an instant connection. So I went home to tell Jeff. He was thrilled. Little did I know that when I went to the Humane Society to do the paperwork, Jeff had to agree. So the shelter needed him to call to give me permission to get the cat. Talk about being careful with their charges!

So now we have our 4-year old little boy that Jeff named Ruxin. He was a stray when the shelter got him so he really didn't have a name that they knew of so we liked the idea of getting to give him one. When we got Toby he came with that name so we kept it. This time we got to choose, so since the kitty picked me, Jeff picked the name. That seemed fair.

Ruxin was a little skittish at first. He is afraid of loud noises and jumps at sudden movements. He was a bit shy but he is starting to warm up to us. It seems that he loves routine just like us. He is up with us early in the morning and if we stay up late, he is nudging us to go to bed. He knows when he gets fed and he knows when 'dad' gets home from work. He hangs out with me in my sewing room too.

I did warn him that he was going to have to like football so he is slowly getting used to us cheering when our Packers play. I think the fear of loud noises will wane. So we lovingly welcome Ruxin to our family. Our granddaughters love him too!

R.I.P. Toby

Today I had to put my kitty to sleep. It was the hardest decision I ever had to make. He's been so sick that I carry him around for most of the day. Over the last three days, he just lays in one spot and doesn't move. He can barely pick up his back legs and he has stopped eating again. I've known it's time since yesterday but I just struggle to make that call. I took this photo of him as a reminder of how sick he looks.

Today I got up and checked on my kitty and he was laying in his usual spot. I poured myself a cup of coffee only to turn around and witness him having a seizure.  His little body went stiff and tremored for what seemed like forever.  Once his body relaxed I picked him up and held him as usual. He looked so confused. I rocked him in the rocking chair from that moment until almost noon. I decided to set him down on his blanket while I did a few chores. I left him alone for about an hour. When I came back to him he was trying to crawl using his front paws but his back ones just laid there. I propped his legs up and he immediately fell. So I made the call. I called Jeff and told him I have an appointment at 5:10 this afternoon.  He said he would make sure he was home in time to come with me.

When Jeff got home it was 4:00. I had held Toby all day except for that one hour, and he never attempted to wiggle off my lap. He went from sleeping in my arms to just looking at me. Not that he could see me since he was blind. It was as if he was asking for help. When Jeff got home, I set Toby on the carpet and he just laid there. I tried to physically stand him up and he did stand there.  When he made an effort to walk, his paws bent backwards with each step like he didn't even know they were there and there was no muscle control of them. I handed him to Jeff, I knew he wanted some cuddle time before we left to see Dr. Nick.

When we got to the vet we were whisked into a room and Dr. Nick came in to talk.  We went over the events of the past few weeks and he gave us his sympathy and told me I was doing the right thing.  Dr. Nick waited patiently until I was ready to hand Toby over. I kissed him on the head and told him I was so very sorry this had to happen to him. Jeff said his goodbyes and set him down in front of Dr. Nick.  Dr. Nick explained what would happen next so we were prepared and within minutes Toby was gone. The doctor left the room and let us stay with Toby for as long as we wanted.  I was prepared to put Toby to sleep, I realized I was preparing all week for this moment.  What I wasn't prepared for was leaving his body behind. It was hard to leave him. We were having a private cremation so I had to take comfort in getting his cremains back in a few days.

It will take a long time to get over our loss.

Rest In Peace Toby

My Poor Kitty

Last week Monday I had to take my Toby to the vet.  He's been losing weight and stumbling a lot over the past few weeks. Then he stopped eating and using the litter box. And his eyes were dilated. As I thought more about his situation, more things came to light, like I realized that he has stopped purring and he doesn't go in his kitty condo anymore. He also stopped cleaning himself. I was doing it for him. When we got to the vet, Dr. Nick's staff weighed him and he weighed 2 pounds less...that is 1/5th of his entire body weight! I did not realize what terrible shape he was in. I thought the stumbling was just aging at first. It takes him longer to stretch and he's been moving slowly over the course of the entire winter season. I think I was in denial.

Dr. Nick said Toby was dehydrated and that they would have to keep him in intensive care for a few days. They would run tests to get to the bottom of his issues. When I picked him up on Wednesday, he looked so much better.  He wasn't listless anymore however, the vet did not have good news.  They did all the standard tests; feline leukemia, diabetes, thyroid disorder...everything they could try, they did.  So the diagnosis was down to one of two things; he either had a brain tumor or a parasite.  He was also blind now. To know for sure, a CAT scan of his brain would have to be done.  Considering the expense, I wanted to avoid that.  So the vet knew a workaround.  We would treat him as if he had the parasite. That meant antibiotics which would fix the problem within 7 days.  If it wasn't a parasite, he would not improve and that would mean the only thing left was a brain tumor and if that were the case, the antibiotics would not hurt him either way. So we left the vet's office after two days of IV fluids, x-rays, lab work and a steroid injection. The poor boy was put through the ringer.

I asked Dr. Nick about the worst case scenario.  If the medication doesn't work, how will I know when he is at the end of his life. How will I know if he is suffering. Dr. Nick assured me that Toby is is no distress, if he was he would be trying to hide from everyone but he is a happy boy right now. He stated that Toby would continue to stumble and start to have seizures.  He also stated that since I knew him so well, I would know when it was time. I would feel it.

I gave Toby the antibiotics religiously and he seemed to get better. His eyes cleared up, he wasn't stumbling anymore and he went into his kitty condo! Things are looking good so I took a photo of him to send to the vet so he knew Toby would be fine. We prayed for his recovery everyday day while crossing our fingers at the same time. I would hold him daily and he even purred for me like he used to do.

Unfortunately, it was a false hope. By the end of the medication dosing, Toby was back to being listless and stumbling.  His eyes went hazy again. I took on the challenge of keeping him comfortable and hope that I can keep him around for a while yet.  At least he is eating and using the litter box even though it is a struggle. I hold him daily, sometimes for hours at a time knowing he won't be with us for very long.  He is only 13 years old.  This is so unfair.

Toby meets a toad

I took Toby out for the usual Saturday morning walk around the yard. There happens to be a black toad living by the roses so I thought it would be fun to see how the curiosity of a cat behaves around this newly discovered creature. Toby loves to check out the critters who live in the yard, it's always entertaining.

As he approached the toad, Toby put out his paw to touch the creature, next thing I knew the cat was shaking his head from side-to-side while flinging his saliva everywhere. He was foaming at the mouth like a rabid dog. From trying to get rid of it, the foamy saliva was wrapped all around his head to where he looked like he was slimed like in Ghostbusters.

I immediately got some paper towels, wet them down and wiped all the saliva off the cat. He was pretty uncomfortable but he settled down once I cleaned off his tongue. I quickly googled the toad to discover that they shoot venom as protection from predators. The venom makes the victim uncomfortable, but is basically harmless in the long run. Well he was pretty uncomfortable all right.

I felt so bad that I could have harmed my little kitty. Toby is so friendly and harmless and I thought it would be fun to watch is gentle curiosity in action. Thank goodness he is OK.

Toby's Bad Day

I started last night. It was a little after 9 and I was thinking about getting ready for bed. It began with the sound of Toby galloping across the hall. He was really hoofing it. I thought for sure it was a game. Then I heard the squealing. It was a chirpy little sound. And consistent, like a squeaky wheel on a wagon. Squeak, squeak, squeak. I started to pay more attention to it when it began to sound a little like screaming. It was obviously a small voice. Toby was relentless in his chase. That's when it occurred to me - he's chasing a MOUSE! Oh no. I hate mice. And no one is home but me. The men are up north and Bailee is at her boyfriend's house so I will have to deal with this all by myself. Shit.

I got up from my chair, tentatively. Toby's little cat ears were casting a shadow on the wall across from the basement steps. I tip-toed over to the steps and he was sitting there meowing quite seriously while trying to get behind some jars sitting in the corner of the first step. The mouse had to be behind it. I decided to play chicken and leave Toby to the dirty business of getting the mouse. When he finds them he tends to bat them around until he kills them. Then he will just sit there jabbing at them as if he's wondering why they won't move anymore. So I went back to the living room, turned off the television, and picked up a little. I checked the locks and peeked at the cat. He wasn't on the basement step anymore. Uh-oh. Where's the damn mouse?

I was too tired (and scared) to pursue it so I headed through the foyer to go upstairs to bed. Toby was sitting in the foyer with his head buried in a decorative crate in the middle of the foyer. He must have let the mouse go temporarily only to catch up with it here. Or else there is more than one! I'm not gonna think about that, I'm just going to bed. I better make sure I shut the bedroom door I don't want Toby bringing me any little mice gifts in the middle of the night.

I got up to the same familiar sound from the night before. Toby was scuttling across the hall. By the time I got downstairs, his head was buried in the crate again. I wonder if he chased that thing around all night. If so, he must be exhausted. After all, cats need about 20 hours of sleep. I put the mouse out of my mind, got my coffee and settled in to read the Sunday paper. On occasion, I like to sit in my big chair in the living room to read the paper. Normally, we read the paper at the kitchen table, but when it's cold in the house, the comfort of the big chair is nicer than the cold wooden kitchen chairs.

I finished with the paper and started my chores. I put some laundry in the wash machine and headed to kitchen to start food prep for the day. Toby was lying on his rug in front of the patio door, just watching me work. Apparently he forgot about the mouse. Note to self: tell Jeff to look in the crate when he gets home today and get rid of the carcass. I started frying bacon, pouring more coffee in my cup, and washing some apples when Toby got up and scurried to the corner of the room. All of a sudden the mouse comes running from the corner to under the garbage can. I screamed so loud the cat stopped his pursuit to turn and look at me. At this point, I'm standing on a stool as he looks up with this WTF look on his little kitty face. Of course he lost track of the mouse once I screamed.

I knew it was under the kitchen garbage container so I just went back to what I was doing hoping it would just stay put. It didn't. Toby chased the thing from the corner to under the garbage and back a few times. I think he finally got tired of the game and went back to lying on the rug. The rug split the difference from the corner to the garbage so he had all the bases covered.

Usually I like the quiet of the family's absence but this one time I was hoping they would be home early and they weren't. Bailee came home around noon with her boyfriend's two cats. Toby was back in hot pursuit of the mouse again and it was hiding under the computer desk. The new kitties were introducing themselves to Toby and he didn't seem to mind. At least at first he didn't. Then the cats started hissing at him. He didn't like that. He didn't seem to like the distraction from his mouse mission either. I explained the situation to Bailee who was no help. She said she hated mice too and wouldn't want to have to get rid of one either. Her cats took off to an unknown destination.

Toby seemed to have forgotten about the cats and went back to his mission of chasing the mouse. Jeff and BJ got home around 1. I explained to the boys about the mouse and the two cats that are roaming the house somewhere. Jeff approached Toby and he hissed at him. I'm thinking that was a late reaction to the new cats. Or he was pissed off about the many distractions from his mouse mission. Jeff decided to get in on the hunt. He got out his leather gloves and a yardstick to force the mouse out. As he did this, Toby seemed more interested in Jeff than the mouse so he missed him running by. Jeff yelled at the cat.

I figured between the cat and the mouse, exhaustion should be setting in and they would both give up. The cat figured out the purpose of the yardstick once he saw the mouse go by. Not much gets by this cat, he won't make the same mistake twice. So Jeff goes after the mouse again. This time Toby let the mouse run right past his leg. But at that moment, he picked up his paw to hold the mouse down. Jeff picked the mouse up from under the cat's paw. The poor thing was probably so tired he just didn't care anymore.

Jeff took the mouse outside and let it go. Now all poor Toby had to deal with was the other two cats in his territory. They buried themselves under a shelf in the basement. Apparently they were as happy to be here as Toby was to have them here. Bailee pried them out from their protective hiding spot and brought them back upstairs. Now that the mouse distraction was gone, they all just sat and hissed at each other.

I know Bailee thought it would be a good thing to bring the cats over to a larger place to run, but apparently they were much happier in their little home. So she packed them up and took them back to her boyfriend's apartment. Toby's busy day must have worn him out. He sat on the rug struggling to keep his eyes open. I wiped out his dish, put new food in it, rinsed out and refilled his water dish, and he walked over to eat. A few minutes later he curled himself into a ball in his sleeping place and was out for the day. And probably for the rest of the night till tomorrow.

My spoiled cat

My family says I spoil my cat. I did make him this quilt but it didn't happen on purpose. I went to my favorite fabric store, Calico Canvas and Colors in Racine so Bailee could get some new kids' fabrics. While we were there I was browsing and I found this oh so cute fabric with kitties and doggies all over it. The patterns included little paw prints in bold colors and so many fantastic color combinations that I could not resist. So I picked out 5 fat quarters. And yes, I know that CC&C doesn't sell fat quarters-they have half-yard cuts but since they look like fat quarters I will continue to call them that! I took the fabric home and stared at it for a long time. As I continued to think about it during the work day I started surfing for quilt patterns when I was bored. I found this really cool triangle pattern that looked busy yet had some consistency to it. And the quilt was born. Bailee fell in love with it as well and is in the process of making a baby quilt with the same pattern. I spent two full days completing the project and it is adorable. Plus I think Toby likes it.

My Toby

This is my Toby. He is sweet, playful, curious, moody, and wonderful to have around. He is loving, likes to cuddle and give me kisses. He purrs whenever I touch him, he gives attitude when he wants, and he will befriend you the instant he meets you. I let him think he is in charge and he lets me think I am.

Today he's not happy, even though the sun is shining and he can nap in it, he loves to look out the patio door and watch the birds. But today the temperature is 16 below. You can feel the chill next to the glass so I closed the blinds. He's been weaving in and out of them while giving me a look of dissatisfaction.