As I try to get through the day, the more I feel stuck. I don't know what to do with myself but it doesn't really matter since I don't want to move on. Or maybe it's just that I don't know how it's possible. Today I realized that the horrible, raw grief that I felt in the beginning is starting to wane. As if no matter how much salt is poured on the wounds it just can't hurt as badly as before. But that raw pain has been replaced with a deep, deep sadness that weighs so heavy on me that it explains my feelings of being stuck. Sometimes I can hardly breathe. I can't catch my breath. The days all meld into an empty abyss where nothing matters, there's nothing but pain but I got through another day.
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