Wednesday, August 9

A Call to Microsoft or Welcome to India

I had to call the Microsoft help desk tonight. All I wanted to do was register my MS Office Professional that I just finished installing on a brand new computer. Because I installed it on my old computer, it required a phone call, it would not allow me to activate over the Internet. So here’s how the conversation went:

Tech: “Good evening, welcome to Microsoft. Are you calling regarding Office Professional 2003?”

OK, apparently the number I dialed is directly linked to MS Office Products, good job Microsoft!

Me: “Yes. I need to activate my software.”

Tech: “May I have the first 6 digits of your activation ID?”

Me: “011014”

Tech: “011?”

Me: “Yes, zero one one zero one four.”

Tech: “014?”

Me: “Yes, I mean no..well sort of... zero…one…one…zero…one…four.”

Tech: “011?”

Me: “YES, ZERO…..ONE…..ONE…..ZERO…..ONE…..FOUR!”

Tech: “OK.”

Me: “May I ask your name?”

Tech: “My name is Shamaramu.”

Is it because Animal House has been on HBO at least 10 times in the last week or did I really just hear him say Shama- lama-ding-dong?

Tech: “Is this software installed on another computer?”

Me: “Yes, it’s on my laptop and now I want to put it on my new computer.”

OK technically I lied, I want to put it on Jeff’s new computer and I know that Microsoft doesn’t allow you to share software among family members, but I am a user of this computer so I say no harm no foul.

Tech: “Did this software come with the new computer or did you purchase it separately?”

Me: “Well actually, neither. I am a beta tester for Microsoft so they sent me the software for free as a thank you.”

Tech: “Did this software come with the new computer or did you purchase it separately?”

I think he’s reading a script. I bet he can’t really even speak English. Pick one of the two answers, dummy.

Me: “I purchased it separately.”

Shama: “OK. I will give you the activation ID number 6 digits at a time. Please type in the appropriate boxes… nnnnnn-nnnnnn-nnnnnn-nnnnnn-nnnnnn-nnnnnn.”

This took 5 minutes because he talked so slow. I thought I would never get through it. I wish I would have written it down, I had enough time!

Me: “The numbers are in I clicked next.”

Lama: “Please click next.”

I KNEW he was reading a script.

Me: “OK.”

Ding-Dong: “Please click finish.”

Me: “OK. It’s working. Thank you.”

Tech: “Is there anything else I can do for you.”

Me: “No, thank you.”

Tech: “Have a good evening.”


That must be confusing there since it's gotta be close to morning there.

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